Friends! Where Are The Real Ones?

Gone are the days when friends feel like garments. They are warm and supportive. I wonder who they are today? The pretense and make-belief display pictures and status updates say it all.

It is neither an understatement to say “we live in a world of beefers” nor wrong to say “there exists a few or no friend to trust”. The word sincerity is now obsolete, only a few still have it in their dictionaries.

“Be mindful of whom you confide in” has become a general advice – from both friends and nerds. Who am I supposed to listen to?

I don’t know why people behave unreasonably these days. But, I think jealousy is the bedrock of all.

Jealousy is a resentment towards someone for a perceived advantage or superiority. It has gone beyond a feeling of anger or displeasure, that stems from believing a person is superior. It has become an inner aversion that flows in the body like blood courses through veins.

Understanding has long been identified as the root of any true friendship. To understand someone is to know his character, how he feels and why he behaves the way he does. Understanding is the yardstick in determining the strength and weaknesses of an individual. No wonder Lucius Seneca said:

ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL QUALITIES OF FRIENDSHIP IS TO UNDERSTAND AND TO BE UNDERSTOOD

Who is to be trusted?

Often times, I hear people chorus this as an anthem. Trust is one of the foundational building blocks, it enables us to feel safe with friends. And the betrayal of trust can be devastating. Betraying a friend’s confidence – sharing something he confided in you can dent the trust in a friendship.

Common interest has nothing to do with compatibility just as some people yearn it to be. Compatibility is about respect, for instance, If you like writing and I don’t, we can be happy together as long as you don’t judge me for not writing and I don’t try to stop you from running. It’s that simple.

I hope friendship will bring back it’s lost glory in social support, which is an aspect of psychotherapy in medical intervention. It involves the use of friends and loved ones to make a patient feel better.

It proved to be effective. It relieves the patient of his or her worries and facilitates recovery.

It’s high time we brought back the word sincerity into our engagements and dealings so that we would have the honesty of mind, purity of intention, freedom from simulation, hypocrisy, disguise or false pretenses akin to chameleons.

Let’s revive the beauty of friendship, rooted in a truthful appreciation of others, knowing that their progress does not dwarf yours. Be one such true friend and you’ll find a sincere, like-minded fellow.

And don’t forget, sharing is caring!

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